#1 - One of many, to be sure

If I were an eccentric billionaire the first thing I would do is retrieve this "to-do" list, not a particularly eccentric act, right?



Wrong!



It's how I would go about it; most would simply remember the url, or sign in and find it, but would I? No. I would buy the servers that host all of blogspot.com just to say I own them. Of course it wouldn't end there, nooo, dissatisfied with the number of comments on my blog I would hire an army of high priced lawyers to comment at least twice on each post, but here's the clincher; they wouldn't be allowed to read any of the posts beforehand.

To add insult to injury, I would tell them that any comment that displeases me will result in mass firings and many ruined lives. (I would imagine that some will be compelled to end their suffering right there and then, but where's the fun in that?)

Now let's add in a sandtrap and a waterhazard; each comment would be edited before being posted, edited by a Monkey. Hilarity and monkey noises ensue.

Something tells me the final product would be a home pc covered in monkey fesces, banana peels and a few unposted comments that would look something like this:

Dan 63 said...

nbdoa owo d diow oister sandwich monkey fart. wueo ew XCMNUE WOW IWW POO

(added fun, try saying that out loud with a straight face)

The fun's not over yet kids! Next I would let loose my army of weaselese lawyers upon the masses of innocent people that have blogs registered here with nothing more than a few simple instructions; post quotes from conversations or television shows that can be associated to the post being commented on, but that don't make any sense out of context.

Sneak peak; check the first 4 comments on this post.